"Can I Watch ____ Show?": Answers for your Kids & Teens
Need some quick tips for how to respond to your child's requests around digital media? Here you go...
Parents, sometimes we need quick answers to hard questions. “Because I said so” is a perfectly fine answer on occassion, but it is not terribly effective at shaping our kids’ hearts & minds. Here are five things to consider when your kid asks, “Can I watch _____ Show?”.
Culture has changed rapidly over the past few years. Many shows today are full of cultural viewpoints that celebrate values and ideals more similar to the debauchery of the Roman Empire than Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood. When it comes to deciding what television shows and movies you let kids watch, here are a few tips that have worked in our house:
Is it a school day? Then the answer is no. Removing screen time on school days gives kids & teens time to do their homework, get chores done, play outside and be creative. Having a simple rule that TV isn’t for Monday - Thursday will help limit the amount of time your son or daughter is consuming digital media throughout the week.
Don’t ever say yes without doing research first! “Billy’s mom lets him watch this show” shouldn’t be our standard. I’m sure Billy’s mom is great, but third hand vouching has led me to uncomfortable situations as a parent. I use a combination of CommonSense Media and PluggedIn for research. I do NOT agree with all of their recommendations or assessments, but between the two I find I get a pretty good picture of what to expect.
When you have to tell your kids no to a show because of the content, decide if you are going to discuss with them the reason as to why. This can be a great way to discuss a “cultural norm” without exposing your chid. It’s okay to say no to a show because it normalizes something that is antithetical to Christian morality.
It’s okay to abstain from TV. If the television is causing drama in your house, you can choose to opt-out. In our house we have had multiple long stretches (30-45 days) of not watching TV at all and we’ve all done just fine. The first few days are the hardest but after that I find our house is a lot more calm and peaceful.
“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable - if there is any more excellence, and if there is anything praiseworthy - dwell on these things.” Philippians 4:8 Watching TV is entertainment. Choose to be entertained by things that are good. Impress this verse on your child’s heart.
Have more questions from your kids that need answers? Comment below and I’ll get to them in a future What To Say by DCP post!
Thanks for this. I find that deciding once (i.e. is it a school day then the answer is no) is really powerful and prevents me from saying yes to something I haven't fully considered.
I'm wondering if you might post in the future about navigating those situations where perhaps as a parent you have said yes in the past - either because you thought it was OK but now have concerns or you made a mistake and took Billy's mom's word for it, etc and now feel you need to say no. Any tips on managing the fall out from that kind of situation?